Learning to accept

[scruffypuffball]

@Krishna @Blended @Libra @Libra

my parents went through this for many years.  they passed away recently both in their 90s.  it was so hard. now my brother is expecting me to contribute to his bills, but he is my abuser so i am working with lawyers to try and detangle myself, get a different administrator to handle his affairs.  I am beyond exhausted...

gp trying to organise ndis now and hospital has re-activated his file so he is back in the system as he was not going to get his injections.  that gives a bit of peace of mind as they need case management.

[Blended]

(Edited version)

I'm still trying and trying and trying to find a version of Acceptance that doesn't just feel like progressively retreating step by step.

Once I accepted and made my peace with him moving back in for a few weeks, the arrangement shifted and became a few months. I made my peace with that, and watched the year anniversary sail by and the New Year become the end of the tunnel... Then March... And now "the foreseeable future"

The boundaries erode inch by inch.

Inch by inch. Acceptance then new terms then new acceptance then new terms.

I've never been able to find a version of Acceptance that is distinguishable from giving up, sucking it up, and keeping quiet.

I know that it's about knowing what I can control - like my reaction - but I can't see how choosing to react differently (accepting that I have no control over the behaviour or the boundaries) is any different to giving in and just sucking it up...