Hi.
Lots of thoughts today. Am OK.
Anyone lonely & up for a chat?
I'm having a deep thought about what it is to be loved & to love.
Perhaps entirely irrelevant, I am on autism spectrum. Possible indications that we feel more deeply? Think more deeply? There is no way I can possibly confirm or deny this.
Love for self.
I know I have heaps of love inside me.
I think I am scared to let others love me?
I feel like it's almost not possible.
When I get the sense that a person might have very deep feelings for me, it scares me.
I can do casual, superficial. "My comfort zone."
I think I'm scared, terrified of hurting people.
I know what it feels like to have my heartbroken. I feel safe keeping things casual because I tell myself, if things end - the other person won't be too hurt.
Maybe I have this impossible delusion of grandeur about myself.
I think my love would be too much.
Gonna add a song link.
When I have experienced love, I can only accept it to a level that feels safe for me.
I don't feel safe to completely surrender myself to love.
Logically I think I know that - it has to be safe. Real love couldn't hurt. Even if the person died? I don't know. I want to believe in this magical heavenly eternal love...maybe God..
Gonna link another song now.
I got distracted - was going to say more?
Hello @tyme
Anyone who wants to chat, new, old, scared, brave, thinks I'm silly, thinks I'm smart - man, I feel the worst for NPD. This diagnosis scares me a lot.
Are there really people who can only hurt people?
What if I am one?
Are they bad people?
People do bad things. Really bad things.
What is Putin doing?
What is this world?
People who are hurt. People who express hurt...deeply...I fall in love.
Love is sad....?
Love is Joy..?
Yeh.
Posty Sunflower
One Of Us
