Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[BlueSky3]

Hi All :).

The 3 Aim's of my Lengthy post: 

1. I would like to share my story in the spirit of open communication in order to get recommendations for supports that can help me. Also , I would like to have discussions with carers on tackling certain problems. As an extrovert, I get my energy from others and I am very open when it comes to personal communication. At the same time, I am very selective whom I talk to due to privacy reasons and not wanting my personal problems to impact my work. Last thing I would like to happen, is that an in-component manager in the mental health field gives me problems when they find out the complex nature of my family situation. I have seen it happen to other workers, I would like to avoid it happening to me. Unfortunately there is that 1% of people in the field, whom really should not be working in it. 

2. Any recommendations on accessing services that can help my family of 4. I have 2 children, primary school age and a Newborn.   

3. Assistance/recommendations finding a psychologist for my self. Keep in mind, I have helped 100's of clients do the same, its not a matter of how to do it, its a matter of maintaining my privacy. I wish to avoid psychologists in my social circle, my professional life and at the same time finding a psychologist that matches my unique needs. Ideally I would connect best with a psychologist whom themselves is in a similar situation as me. 

4. Very open for recommendations on how I can protect my privacy when accessing service. I have personally seen a fair few to many breaches of privacy of worker and clients. I did my best to report all of them, and unfortunately the real life responses from workplaces is not what University teaches you it should be. 

Background Information: 

I am Clinical Counsellor working in the field of Social Work for more than 10 years. 

I have worked in various fields across multiple suburbs. Ranging from counselling/social work jobs. There was multiple reason for moving locations frequently, One of the major one is Safety for my wife with violence from her step father being the main concern. 

My Wife, partner of 12 years, is suffering from complex P.T.S.D. Due to her experience of family violence from her stepfather and very significant childhood trauma. In the 12 years of dating, she has only worked for a total of 1 year, she needs NDIS support to maintain work. Unfortunately, it was very difficult linking her in with mental health professionals and a psychatrist to get a diagnosis and gather evidence required for NDIS. 

Unfortunately, I have limited family supports. My father has passed away 15 years ago, my mother has significant lifelong mental health problems, I have managed to get her NDIS support. My sister has behaved very inappropriately in front of my wife, as a result I no longer talk to her. 

Currently the services I have involved are 2 psychiatrists, 1 for my wife's PTSD and 1 for my A.D.H.D. We also have a relationship counsellor and a counsellor for my wife. Seeking a psychologist/counsellor for my self. 

I have applied for NDIS for my wife, Unfortunately it got rejected. Please consider, I have been helping clients with NDIS applications since NDIS started, in the last few months, there has been way to many rejections, and that is comparing it to the high amount of rejections I have received in 2022 alone. I am desperately seeking a disability advocate to help with this. Any recommendations will be great, the more details on the recommendations, the better. I have 2 friends in  the field of Disability that might be able to help me, however I would like to use them as a last resort, once again to protect my own privacy and my wife's privacy. 

Unfortunately, I am currently in a private rental that has gone up to much and has become very unaffordable for me. In the year 2022, I have depleted all my savings and acquired a 3000$ credit card debt and due to issues with fringe benefit that occurred when I changed job in January 2022 ( I used the 15900$ +2600 meal card$ salary sacrifice twice in the year for the first time, due to being eligible ) ,As a result, due to miscalculations in tax deduction, I have now a 4000$ Tax debt due to bad estimation of Fee help and it also resulted in a 2200$ centerlink debt due to not being eligible for parenting payment of 84$ a fortnight . To say I am struggling financially, is an understatement. Logically, I should be looking for a cheaper rental. Unfortunately I dont have the funds to move or the capacity to borrow. 

Any recommendations or communication will be much appreciated.

Warm Regards,

Blue Sky :" Resilience is accepting your new reality, even if it’s less good than the one you had before. You can fight it, you can do nothing but scream about what you’ve lost, or you can accept that and try to put together something that’s good.”
― Elizabeth Edwards"

[BPDSurvivor]

Wow… thanks for your detailed post @BlueSky3 . 

I could probably help with 2 points. 

Firstly, help for your children. What sort of help? I’m a teacher and have worked for many years with all ages, stages and behaviours. Are there any specific supports you are looking for? Oh, and by the way, I may need to know what state you are in do that I can direct you to state initiatives. No worries if you don’t feel comfortable with this.

Secondly, have you ever used sane’s other services? They have a counselling line that anyone over 18 years old can use. You can search the number. The counsellors are so good. SANE also have a guided service that has just rolled out. You don’t need a mental health care plan and it’s all free. You could probably do a search on that to see if you can take part. I reckon you can safely rely on confidentiality there. 

All the best. Please tag me in your posts if you feel up to it. You type ‘@‘ in front of my username.