Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.
03 Jun 2025 06:03 PM
03 Jun 2025 06:03 PM
03 Jun 2025 06:07 PM - edited 03 Jun 2025 06:08 PM
03 Jun 2025 06:07 PM - edited 03 Jun 2025 06:08 PM
@Oaktree oh pain is an understatement, my immediate family have no idea of my attempt or of my relationships, I allowed them to destroy all I had built once, so never again, they will never meet anyone I care about, I refuse to give them that power. In regards to support I have weekly appointments with a clinical psych. that started just before Christmas, after I discovered my gp had dropped the ball on my workcover treatment and was being mistreated. Prior to that I had weekly psych sessions with no improvement, I continued destroying my life piece by piece.
To look after me, my PTSD memory shields me from my work place trauma and all that happened with my ex, it also numbs me to my current situation, which only affects me when I talk about it (crying my eyes out as I type this). I am focusing on the now, what I know to be true rather than focusing on the what if's and other hypothetical situations that my mind tortures me with. I have finally managed to get an appointment with a psychiatrist after 2 and 1/2 years, again I had to push for it, damn GP! Oh yeah and I mask a lot of pain with humour, I mean that worked well for Robin Williams (sorry dark humour)
03 Jun 2025 06:16 PM - edited 03 Jun 2025 06:31 PM
03 Jun 2025 06:16 PM - edited 03 Jun 2025 06:31 PM
@Oaktree Oh yeah I meditate and do my mantra twice a day, I try to keep my mind busy. I have been doing my hobbies a little bit, but as soon as I start feeling good about something I then feel guilty as the reality is brought back by my mind torturing me, so I try to stay in a neutral state. A lot of the issues have been as a result of poor communications between my partner. I love hearing from them and chatting with them, unfortunately there were delays between their replies to me of up to 3 days at times, so I eased off and thought I was coming across as needy. It's hard when the only means of communication left is emails, but I respect their wishes. The sad bit is that I have a habit of sacrificing my needs for the needs and wants of my partner/s. Which I'm doing yet again, and I don't see it as I'm in a place to make requests have expectations given all I've done and the damage.
03 Jun 2025 06:18 PM
03 Jun 2025 06:18 PM
Just so you know, I care about you and want you to be ok. I am glad that you are getting professional support. It is important to stay in the now. Grounding exercises are good if you haven’t tried them. Like 5 senses.
03 Jun 2025 06:21 PM
03 Jun 2025 06:21 PM
@Oaktree thankyou for your kind words, Yeah I ground myself before every meditation, I wear my crystals whilst I'm awake, I have incense going most of the time and usually have some sort of meditation / binaural beats tracks going for keeping my frequency up.
03 Jun 2025 06:23 PM - edited 03 Jun 2025 06:24 PM
03 Jun 2025 06:23 PM - edited 03 Jun 2025 06:24 PM
@Oaktree Honestly if my actions have destroyed everything, the pain sadness, shame and regret is something that I will carry for the rest of my life. I know I can and will go on and rebuild, most likely alone.
If you stuff up once, it's a mistake, if you stuff up the same way again, it's a choice.
04 Jun 2025 09:04 AM
04 Jun 2025 09:04 AM
@Sparky79 Sparkles you are too hard on yourself.
Who put that “If you stuff up once, it's a mistake, if you stuff up the same way again, it's a choice.” rule on you?
We are humans, not robots 🤖
Have you seen how the human body is built? It’s a Lemon, mate.
I tell my grandchildren, “I am human. Therefore I will make mistakes. Some mistakes more than once.”
Humans are inherently flawed.
We are in a constant state of feeling and emotion. Our unconscious or subconscious mind controls most of what we do, without us being aware of what we are doing.
You don’t have to think about what you are doing when you drive your car. You’re just reacting.
Who gave you that rule?
What other rules did they give you?
04 Jun 2025 09:10 AM
04 Jun 2025 09:10 AM
@Glisten Good morning, I hope you are well.
I read that saying (well a variation of it years ago), It went "the first time is a mistake, the second time is a choice", pretty much along the lines of if you've made a mistake it should be a learning opportunity, therefore if you make the same mistake again, it's because you chose it, knowing full well the outcome. After all the definition of insanity is doing the same thing again and again expecting different results.
It's not a rule that has been imposed on me, it's more me stating that I've made this mistake once and if it happens again it's because I haven't learnt my lesson and I chose for it to happen. Whether that choice was a conscious one or a subconscious one is another matter.
13 Jun 2025 02:22 PM
13 Jun 2025 02:22 PM
How are you Sparks?
Have you heard anything on the legal front regarding this whole mess?
Hopefully they have no grounds for suing.
13 Jun 2025 02:30 PM - last edited yesterday
13 Jun 2025 02:30 PM - last edited yesterday
@Oaktree touch wood,
Members feature!Log in to add spaces, events and discussions to your favourites.
SANE services are not designed for crisis support. If you require immediate support, please contact one of the service providers below.
If you need urgent assistance, see Need help now
For mental health information, support, and referrals, contact SANE Support Services
SANE Forums is published by SANE with funding from the Australian Government Department of Health
SANE - ABN 92 006 533 606
PO Box 1226, Carlton VIC 3053