Need some help with grief

[scoobydoobydoo]

TL;DR -- Looking for affordable mental health help that actually works. Specifically for grief.

Hey, all. No idea how to start this so I'll just give a brief outline of my history with mental illness and then go onto the more important issue.

I am a 20-year-old male living in Perth, WA, and ever since I can remember, I've struggled immensely with managing my mental health.

TW: Suicide

Content/trigger warning

I attempted suicide three years ago and have had self-destructive thoughts and behaviours for my whole life. This is due mainly to family situations that I am now gladly outside of, but they are unresolved and still affect me immensely and consistently every day, so it's not totally irrelevant.

Two and a half months ago now, my little brother comitted suicide. This is the worst thing to happen to me in my entire life and it has completely fucked everything up. Every single day is tainted with the nauseating feeling of my failure and I have constant PTSD-esque flashbacks to that day. I genuinely cannot fathom how to begin moving on even after all this time.

But I need to get better now, for the people that are still left in my life. For my girlfriend, my friends, everyone. I just have no idea how. It feels like a genuinely impossible task and I don't even know where to start. Advice would be greatly appreciated.

[AlwaysMyself]

Hi @scoobydoobydoo ,

Sorry its taken a while for someone to see and respond to your post. I try to remember to come check out this hub because the posts do not appear in the homepage listing of new discussions or recent posts (I assume due to the topic being more likely to be triggering for some people?). I have forgotten to for most of this week whilst being a bit busier and tired.

Im really sorry to hear about your brother, and how you are feeling in the wake of it. 

In terms of services specifically for grief, you could try finding a counsellor/psychologist who lists Grief as a topic area in a service directory? (Eg psychology today website)

I did a quick google for you as I dont personally know what is available in Perth, but one of these may also be helpful?

https://www.griefcentrewa.org.au/

https://www.wa.gov.au/government/multi-step-guides/what-do-when-someone-dies-alpha-stage/get-support...

I notice it is also in the WA Gov listing, some of the phone support lines also offer grief support, like Lifeline.

Would it help you to talk about some of your feelings or memories here?