Lived Experience Forum

[Shaz51]

morning my forum mum @Owlunar 😍❤️

sorry I missed you message yesterday 

of course you are concerned about your daughter`s  multiple health issues 

I am just curious medically and personally --- i agree with you i would be too 

I like looking up all my conditions and reading all about them even thoug the doctor says not to read too much into it 

with me at the moment , I am trying to get an update of mum`s condition but not getting anyway as I am thinking mum has told the doctor not to worry me about her problems which i am thinking is wrong 

but ohh well , they will tell me when something is bad i suppose 

sitting with you and giving you big hugs and having a cuppa with you 

@Appleblossom , @tyme , @Faith-and-Hope , @Zoe7 , @amber22 , @hanami , @Paperdaisy , @FloatingFeather 

[Appleblossom]

Hey @Shaz51 Finding that balance of how much to kn ow ....

@Owlunar 

Sorry things are so hard.  Meds ... oh ... You know your stuff.

Sometimes parents are doomed if you do and doomed if you dont.  There are huge expectations these days, especially of mothers, and seem to be a trend of cutting off family.  Heard another story about that today in my socialiser mode.  Wish knowing it is happening to others made it easier to bear, but it does not.  So the generations miss out on so much ...

Yeah privacy ... what is that? lol  Learning about that very late in life.

[Owlunar]

@Appleblossom @Shaz51 

Thanks so much my dear friends - I have known both of you for so long now - it is great to have your understanding.

It's a strange thing about mothers - our kids wouldn't be here without one - in my case my son had a different birth mother - I don't think he was happy with either of us - and I really believe he was entitled to his displeasure - adoption can be a rough deal for some people.

My daughter though - wouldn't be here without me and I don't expect her to be grateful - just a little less critical. As you say Apple - we can be doomed if we do and doomed if we don't - right now I am giving her space. I have never tried to change her - since she has been battling chronic pain and other health issues I have been among the worst - or it feels that way. She has had sulky periods all her life - my ex and I called her Grumpy (something) when she slammed her bedroom door and refused to come out for as long as it took - expecting to be forgiven and she was. I have never understood sulking and what anyone gets out of it - ah - yes - relief from someone's bad mood is a good thing - who really suffers?

When she gets over herself I will accept her - somehow though I have had enough of her criticism of my medication - she did use the term drug addict at one stage. That was when I cut her off politely - it can be very hard waiting for her to get back to me - on that occasion she posted a Christmas Card the next day but with the lockdown and Christmas mail it was a week before I got it. Um - yes - it might take me longer this time - enough is enough. I am rather tired of her attitude at long last.

Enough said -

Thanks for posting too Shaz - your Forum Mum was pleased - I was at the pain clinic when I read your message - I can't post from my phone - and what a wonderful plate of food and tea - or coffee - I appreciate that.

And yes - I do know my stuff about medication - I have to - I am allergic a lot of different drugs - I am unwilling to take something different - I would not be taking the highly restricted one I am taking now except I was admitted to hospital and felt it was okay to take this new one because the pain was so bad - and it works so fast - that is the great thing about it - it's worth the bother.

So - girls - I am back from the pain clinic having had the third of three expensive treatments that are working it seems - it's non-invasive - painless - possibly I will not have to go back for three months - let's hope so. I can get scripts over the phone.

And of course - there is My Aged Care - what can I say about that? - mmmm - that possibly enough - I don't like it.

I guess you had the heavy rain and thunderstorm this morning Apple - what a wonderful way to start the day - the washing I had left out overnight would have been bone dry seconds before a downpour - ah - it's not the worst thing that can happen - but yeah - darn - it's sunny now so hopefully it will dry

Thanks again both of you.

Owlunar

[Owlunar]

Okay everyone

It's been a fruitful evening and there have been a couple of laughs - it's good to laugh.

I'm off to bed - I hope all of you have the best night possible.

And Apple - thanks for your support - some posts are not easy and it is good to have those thumbs up.

Owlunar

@Appleblossom 

[Appleblossom]

Its been good to have your shoulder to lean on from time to time, and just know you are a strong intelligent and committed to family, woman. @Owlunar 

[Owlunar]

@Appleblossom 

Likewise Apple - you also have a great shoulder - and you have positive values - 

It's really great to be back on the forum - I missed a lot of people while I took months out - I thought I would be back - I didn't know when - after my uncle died I needed to experience my grief - he was more than my uncle - he was my mentor and friend - as was my aunt - his wife - who died only a short time before he did. 

They weren't much older than I am - my father was the oldest of several brothers by a long shot - so my uncles were more like big brothers - I had to have this explained to me when I was small - these boys were Dad's brothers - not mine. I still have one left - I write to him sometimes - he is reclusive and I respect that.

It took time to get over my uncle's death - I was at the funeral - and had dinner with my cousins and we were so rowdy - I enjoyed that evening and nearly a year later I am still enjoying it - I may never see any of them again - time and distance - you know - that's life - memories are forever though.

Lately I have been answering different people with different issues - it has been interesting - I never seemed to have time before - things have changed in my life though - this is a good thing.

I also realised that there are several people who have been around for about the time I joined - we get to know each other people well through years of an interesting medium of contact - 

And - as an aside - this software makes me check my grammar and spelling - I am particular about that. Could it be I was a private English teacher for Year 12 and young Uni students for years? Probably. And I can't use the more appropriate word - never mind -

Thanks Apple - best wishes

Owlunar

[Owlunar]

@Zoe7 @Appleblossom 

I got a blast from the past tonight - my son has information about his story on-line - I do have a hard copy - sometimes I like to read this - it is incorrect though - often I feel the need to correct this - I did actually and it was published in another issue of the AIC publications. I have not seen the correction though I do have a hard copy.

Tonight I found that a book has been published containing that incorrect information. I thought about this for a while and - no - NO - this is wrong. 

I wrote an email to the AIC about this - very concise and accurate - all relevant information - telling them I will go to Canberra to have this sorted out. I have dealt with the AIC before and they were very decent - which is how I have some by and kept a lot of information about my son.

Yep - I'm onto it.

I feel okay - now I have sent the email - how great it is to learn something - and we can write away as soon as we get our ideas together. One issue I need to correct is his indigenous heritage - Black Lives Matter - I am onto that one - I worked hard to get his statistics into the Aboriginal Death in Custody.

He died nearly 37 years ago and I still get up in arms about it - and in this case something was published without my consent or his permission. 

Thanks girls - I know you will understand this

Owlunar

Ah Yes - The AIC is the Australian Institute of Criminology

[Owlunar]

Hi @Sophia1 

This is my thread - I am tagging you in.

It's okay for you to read the above post - if you feel okay about it - I thought not to write a whole list of tags - it's sensitive to me - I feel okay about it though

All the best

Owlunar

[Appleblossom]

@Owlunar 

Good on you, for being clear and precise and getting them to correct your son's details. 

Would not be easy.

Takes love

[Owlunar]

@Appleblossom 

Thanks Apple - yes - it is hard - it took a lot of thought to write the email - but I did and sent it.

Owlunar