Positive Affirmations (with photos)

[StanD]

Hello Beautiful Sane Forums People,

I am over due in visiting, &;, I have missed the forums.

I have tear on cheek. I am noticing how vulnerable I feel.

I am confident woman

I feel like, I have difficulties in accepting success.

As suggested in title, wait no longer. 

May I now present you all with aforementioned posso affos   

I wish you all, the greatest, positive healings,

as I am

StanD xx 

@Shaz51 @Appleblossom @TAB @StuF and everyone xx

[Dizzy4]

@StanD ...such a shame we cldnt see and read them😟. Sokay,am sure you can get it sorted.

[Jynx]

Thanks for lil message @StanD it's lovely to hear from you 💜

@Dizzy4 photos are up now so you can go back and see em!

[StanD]

Hi @Dizzy4 - I am feeling dizzy, I like your name. I appreciate you letting me know. I hope your day is good

[StanD]

Hello @Jynx 

Was it you that I was chatting with re: Tool artist? I cannot recall.

Tool literally saved me these last few days. I was listening on my headphones 🎧 in uber at 2am! 

One does not feel like crying whilst 46 & 2 is playing.

I am struggling today.

It is all repeating patterns. So, I have broken free - it has left me really depressed. Idk I feel very heightened.

See, by former abusive relationship, -  my happiness depended upon how he was for the day 

Now, with new ppl, it's like my happiness dependent upon their company

I think I am crushed self esteem

Maybe that is all it is. 

I can get more, better, confidence.

Maybe I am love addict?

Oh, I really do feel like 'one of those ppl" who cannot be alone. 

And, I feel like, I get blamed for becoming attached to ppl 

I think, I have love/hate relationship with Autism.

Thankyou so much for reading. 

You are all amazing awesomeness always

[Dizzy4]

@StanD  Thank you for sharing...theyre great

[Jynx]

Yep I think so @StanD and I am not surprised!! Tool hits some very good spots in the brain ay. 

I think that's pretty normal hun - we're creatures of habit after all. And that's not just a funny little saying, our brains literally evolved to find the familiar to be comforting. Hence why people do tend to end up staying in abusive relationships for so long, because the system tells them the safety of familiarity of the abuse is less scary than the unknown that comes with leaving. I mean that's oversimplified obvs and just one facet of it but it's still worth remembering - cos it means it's gonna take your system time to re-adjust itself, adjust expectations and adjust how you approach certain things in your relationships. You are building a whole new 'familiarity'. And that can actually feel like a threat to the system sometimes!! 

Do you have a skilled support team around you or like, a decent therapist and stuff? Also if you haven't already, take a peak into attachment trauma. It's one of my special interests so I'm biased lol but it's helped me soooo much in figuring out why I sometimes behave so whacky in my relationships. 

[StanD]

Cool @Dizzy4 thankyou so much for your feedback & I am grateful to know you like them.

@Jynx I feel lil lighter now. You don't need to respond. It was good for me to finally talk, instead of holding everything in, walking around this unit on my own 

I find what problem is.

I cannot move fwd 

Let go of past 

Must look at past, to let go 

Lots of issues with doing that 

I be kind & gentle with myself. I have been through a huge shock.  xx

[StanD]

You are awesome @Jynx I ate every delicious word.

Attachment trauma - thankyou. We don't know, if we don't ask. 

I feel so silly, sharing all of this - & then I think, there is another person, definately, - in this world that feels same.

You articulated my life, makes me feel secure. I know I can be seen.

And it makes so much sense this is basic, primitive instinct. It is hardwired program, & unable to discern what my best interest.

It is battle against me.

I am so so tired 

Of fighting 

My body mind & spirit craves order & peace

Lily Allen The Fear Acoustic 

https://youtu.be/hCL669AARu0?si=FgkOm33N6ipfLyIx 

I have this on my Spotify 

Thankyou for guiding me

I cried lots writing this post 

I am simply amazed, that I am cared for. (Huge Cry) - it is good to get shit out, & it takes more strength to be soft, than it does to he hard 

You can be hard entire life, & stay same 

If soft, then it is Matrix & I am Trinity haha 

Thankyou for being friend

[Jynx]

You're so welcome @StanD it means the world to me to be part of the journey 😊

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@StanD wrote:

it takes more strength to be soft, than it does to he hard 

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THIS! 100000%!! 

I truly value and admire the courage you have shown to be vulnerable with us tonight 🤗💜