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Something’s not right

Where do I start

Re: Where do I start

@snowflake231 

Here a couple of links on Sane to some resources on bipolar that you may find helpful.

Sane Bipolar Factsheet

 

Sane Bipolar Guide 

Re: Where do I start

Hey @snowflake231 , 

 

It sounds so powerful that your daughter is your protective factor - this is what keeps you going. We hear how hard things are for you at the moment, and that you have been through ECT.

 

Do you think a medication review might help? Or are you in the position to have a private admission for intensive therapeutic support?

 

I hear how hard it is for you and really wanted to reach out to let you know that many have been in a smiliar dark place - myself included.

 

I have been in a space where I never thought I'd get out of the darkness. Yet things DID improve eventually.

 

Please hold on.

Re: Where do I start

@MJG017 I don't think I'm in a mindset to write anything down. I know that she feels the depression but I also know if I wrote/ told anyone what I truly feel it would be too much for her to handle. I honestly can't reveal the true extent of the problem. 

Re: Where do I start

@tyme 

No im not in a position to have an admission. I'm however going to talk to my mental health gp to see if we can review the medication any further. 

Re: Where do I start

@MJG017 

Thank you for the links. I looked it up and I am definately going through a mixed episode. I have also found a local support group which I registered for. So thank you. 

Re: Where do I start

So this is hard. I'm definately going through a mixed episode with dysphoria. This is so confusing. On one hand I'm full of energy, but I don't have the drive or attention span to do anything. Thoughts are just running through my head and they get all jumbled up so all I can do is sit on my couch and do nothing. 

I just don't care anymore. I don't care if I live or die. I don't care how I look I don't care if I get sick I just don't care. 

 

Re: Where do I start

Thank you for keeping on being here @snowflake231. Signing up for a support group was super brave, and the conversation with your mental health gp might offer some change, however small. I’ve never heard anyone else say they have a mental health gp (I do, and feel privileged yet fraudulent like someone else probably needs it more or would make better progress - be a more deserving patient - see the things we tell ourselves). I’m thinking of you again today. Just imagine I’ve joined you in the dark hole … or I’m tunnelling from mine to yours so we can share a hole until some more light shines in. Sorry if that’s a crap analogy. I hope for good things for you.

Re: Where do I start

@Semly 

I used to have a bulk billing psychiatrist but he retired and I can't find another one as I just can not afford it. 
at my local medical clinic we have a gp that only does mental health. He used to work for the local inpatient unit. So he is my only option. I'm not sure how good he is I managed to get an appt with him tomorrow when I'm just going to lay it on him. 

Re: Where do I start

@snowflake231 I i really hope he’s good and has anything new or reassuring or helpful for you. ❄️

Re: Where do I start

Hi Snowflake,

 

I feel like some of your replies are responses from your question being put into chatgpt. I do not agree with the responses but here is my personnel one.

I have 3 son's aged in their 30's & 40's who don't speak to me at all. 8 great children I don't see because I didn't know I have had a mental illness all my life. I am only just waking up to that fact now and it is giving me strength to find help.

I'm scared of uncovering everything I have buried, but I think I need to so I can begin to mend my fractured family.

I don't have answers for you. Just ears and understanding.

Sometimes it helps me get through by thinking there is always someone worse off that me.