Something’s not right
20-11-2023 09:52 PM
My self-esteem is PRETTY low right now.
I’ve always wanted a partner, but I’ve never been on a date. People have asked me why. I don’t think there’s any point in me trying to date. It’s not going to go anywhere.
No-one wants someone like me. I think I’m a lovely person, but I’m “one of those people”, who just aren’t meant for any kind of social life. It would be a pipe dream. It’s been like that since I was a kid. Everyone knows one of those people.
I’m about to have an arranged marriage. I don’t really want it, but I can cope with it. I don’t want to fight it, especially because I wasn’t able to find someone myself. I don’t deserve a choice. I don’t even think an arranged partner would want me.
I don’t think the way most people do. I’m not as mentally strong as most people are.
It’s not just me.
The world is really unfair. People being bullied for who they are. People being criticised for no reason. I’ve talked about it before. Like I work for an investment company and someone’s withdrawal was being delayed by a day or two. The client said “it’s a rort, I’ve never dealt with a company like this”.
Yeah, […] whatever mate. Clients don’t even know what they don’t know about what goes on behind the scenes. In reality, the withdrawal had been followed up on, processed, completed and almost paid by the time he called back again. Clients don’t see that, so they don’t understand it.
I love sport, but the way fans pile on to coaches and players when they are struggling is very painful to watch. Zach Wilson is a quarterback, the most important position on the field, for New York, the biggest media city. The way people ridicule him makes me surprised he is still in the league.
In my opinion, he’s not good enough skill-wise to be in the league. But even despite that, I don’t know why he stays. I would much rather retire than continue to be the laughing stock of the nation.
People say “it’s not personal”, but it is personal. Russell Wilson is another example. While his team was struggling, people put out reports saying his teammates didn’t attend his birthday party, that he was entitled, fake…
I would not be that strong. I would not be surprised if a player or coach takes his own life one day due to being bullied by the media and fans. Just seeing it happen is infuriating. Being the subject of it would be extremely difficult.
I watch a bit of content around crime and it really frustrates me when people are sympathetic towards people who are wrongfully convicted, but then when people are accused, even before they have been convicted, they call them pure evil and support maximum sentences, as if they’re guilty. That so ridiculous, it boggles my mind that anyone can think like that.
But ultimately, it’s probably the self-esteem driving the anger.
21-11-2023 06:07 AM
Re: Struggling today…
You have a lot going on. Do you feel the arranged marriage is for you because you have not had a relationship ?