Lived Experience Forum

[hanami]

Hi @Shasan 

Glad to 'see' you again!

Oh yes good old Dr Google can be one nasty piece of work! I am guilty of paying way too much attention to him. 

Sooo for me, what helped me 'bite the bullet' and take medication was the fact I was not sleeping due to my anxiety. I was so darn tired it was ridiculous. A few weeks in and I was sleeping better and I knew I'd made the right decision. I'm keen to hear what others think. 

I read your post about work too and want to reply to that soon. If I forget, tag me for a reminder! 

Sending 'make-good-decisions' vibes,

Hanami 

[Bow]

Hey @Shasan 

I live by the mantra ‘focus on the issue at hand’….. or take things minute by minute. It really does make things a lot easier for me. 

As for medication, this is the second time in my life that I’ve been on medication. I was really reluctant to go back on them cause I worked so hard to get off them many many years ago. But I need them at the moment. They help me survive. They help me be in a place where I can process my trauma and do the work to be well again, so that I can eventually get off them again. I think there is often alot of stigma around having to take antidepressant and such, but there shouldn’t be. There isn’t a stigma around having to take meds for diabetes, or blood pressure meds, so why is there for antidepressant?!

And dr google, I’m sure we are all guilty of that! 

wishing you well

[tyme]

Hey @Shasan - definitely the choice whether to take or not to take meds is entirely up to you.

For me, when I realised I was having less and less control over my life, I gave meds a go. Yes, the side effects made me resistant, but it was either to live with the side effects or not live at all. That's what it came down to.

All the best. I hope you will be able to make an informed decision about it. As you said, it's a bit of trial and error.

tyme

[Shasan]

Good afternoon @hanami @tyme @Bow 

Thank you so much for sharing your experience ❤️ I can see the growth that you'll have had through the challenges you faced and it's great that you're sharing that to benefit others on a similar journey.

I'm so sorry to hear that some of those choices you had to make came down to literally living with side effects or not living at all 🥹 that's sooo heartbreaking, I truly empathize with you and the version of you that had to go through that!! I'm so so so grateful and glad that you were brave and walked into a GP s office and honestly told them what was happening and took help!!! It's no small feat.

Regarding my update: I went to the GP, shared what was happening and got a prescription. But, I was still sensing a lot of resistance & really sad that I had to accept it's a thing and that I need these meds (maybe that stigma speaking once again)... I would've supported anyone in my place unconditionally but wasn't able to do the same for myself! 

Anyway, the whole process somehow became the pick-me-up I needed to try one last time managing it with self-care, one last time (because it's not major depression symptoms, it's still moderate)... I've started a thought journal and check-in 3-4 times a day and can catch a lot of unhelpful, negative, judgmental thoughts... This has really helped me last couple of days to detach and focus on helpful thoughts. 

I've also started St John's wort that seems to be a popular and highly reviewed supplement for mild anxiety and depression - I'll give it a month and track thoughts, symptoms and mood regularly...

If despite the supplements, self-care, taking action to cope with stress isn't helping... I'll switch to ADs in 1.5 months time. So currently this is the goal and task at hand I'm focusing on... 

I've parked work and job stuff for a week (taking it slow and not doing anything new) while I get on top of health admin and feel like I'm listening to honoring my needs in this area first.... 

I found this article incredibly helpful from an educational pov. Article by Qld researchers - https://qbi.uq.edu.au/brain/brain-diseases/depression/depression-and-brain#:~:text=Depression%20invo....

[hanami]

Hi @Shasan 

That's great to hear that you have this plan. And it sounds like a really doable plan. A good way to see if you really need an AD or not. Crossing all my fingers and toes for you that it works!

Great info in the link too. 

Sending positive wishes

Hanami ❤️