Lived Experience Forum

[HeyJoeI]

I have been separated most of my married life. I stayed married as I was concerned about my estranged wife & she sabotaged several relationship opportunities. I felt unwell & found that I have terminal illness in my 60’s. I will live longer than I want to as living alone for so long has left me damaged. I have a potential wife. I would say I love her. A professional would not. I see her once a week & I won’t see her often daily once we are married. I pine for her. She doesn’t have any problem. She is ideal when I see her. I find this a much better prospect than nobody. I tried the dating sites. I am not competitive. I can’t put myself into social situations in the community. ‘damaged’ Therefore I need to train myself to be in a relationship with someone who loves me, who hardly communicates 6 days a week. Gives me one day to do anything I want. I study cosmology, religion, the question of reality on YouTube. My psychologist would say I am walking towards a hole. 

[Appleblossom]

Hey @HeyJoeI 

Like your interests.

Love and loneliness and managing our feelings...we all struggle with that.

Just wanted to welcome you to the forum.

[HeyJoeI]

Thank you. It is nice to be involved. I believe the forum will be a good place to explain my circumstances & my feelings. I am generally independent & strong however I find romantic partners more challenging

[defaultusername]

Hi @HeyJoeI,

Thank you for reaching out and sharing your story with us, I am sorry about your current health concern.

I think it's admirable that you're acknowledging your feelings of loneliness and putting yourself out there.

And the fact you are seeing a psychologist is wonderful, are you happy with them?

Good luck with your studies!

Know that you are not alone,

defaultusername

[Jasper_123]

@HeyJoeI I'm so sorry to hear about your illness. Can you explain further about your relationship? I suppose the question is: are you happy settling? If so, it is your choice to enter into this marriage.